and there's no, well, special reason why i insist to write this blog in the middle of the night. it's 12 am here and i wish i would get into my blanket again soon. but i just feel like writing since i haven't been really productive in anything lately.
i have applied for part time jobs... not really. i did enter the application form online for both macca and kfc but i have this strong hunch that i will not get the offer. i wrote cv, but am not well impressed since there is pretty much nothing to write other than personal details. i wish i could and would have done more, you know, sort of extracurricular activities and got involved with it. but hey, i never regretted my past and so that was not something to be really.... i don't know, concerned with.
i guess i am all tensed lately, and hopefully not too much. i have this urge to 'make a difference' to my, i shouldn't say this, but, dull life. i'm wondering if i've been staying inside the line too long and should make the first step outside, or if it is too early to do so. my conviction, though, keeps me going on for now and i am well grateful for it.
well-inspired by some people who gave up in none of their efforts to reach their dream, i really wish i could make mine true.
on a lighter note, i paid the price for not doing any exercise during that one month break. i went to the gym this, no, yesterday morning and got exhausted real quick. i was barely able to cycle for more than 5 minutes after some light weight training session. my muscles are all cramped up now and i really hope i will get back to my top performance real soon.
and i think that's all for now before my english gets even broken.
2 comments:
Hv they replied regarding ur application?!
i'd prefer to remain kinda-but-maybe-not-really anon. you can probably figure out who i am, though
i don't know, but it's like when you're in melb you feel like you're suddenly put into this endless plain with this brand new free sky you've never had before and it's pretty terrifying but it's been close to a year and it gets old pretty quick, and so you wake up every day and think, 'oh, it's the same day again' and you go to sleep not looking forward to tomorrow. frankly i don't know where to go or when or where to take my first step and sometimes i just feel like stepping in front of a tram just so i don't have to make a choice - but i won't. i won't and i don't want to because no matter how grey the sky gets it's still my sky, dammit, and i'm gonna break through it (that'll get me into outer space, and it's totally a ridiculous metaphor but yeah).
that aside - i really admire you. you've already started taking steps with the job thing and all.
carrying on. this turned out to be my therapy session, lolz. so so sorry - but i don't allow myself to say stuff like this in rl and i just had to let this out. and even if you won't ever read this, thank you.
that all said - i hope you find the excitement you're looking for, i hope you cross that line with a bulldozer and most importantly i hope you find that satisfaction everyone wants in their life.
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